I’ve had a bit of a feud with Glentertainment since I started being a guest on Asked, by feud I mean I shit on the retarded kid until he cried. I was drunk one night when Glenn decided to make fun of me and he took a beating from me that was so hard I’m pretty sure he shame ejaculated afterward.
Glenn has the face of a kid whose father beat him with a pay phone after he wandered off in Walmart. He has the goatee of someone who fixes computers and looks at other people’s porn collection. In fact I hate Glentertainment so much I asked my friends at Pornhub to unfollow him just so he would cry. You're welcome internet, I made an adult male cry. He has the acne of a preteen that watches Pokemon, which is fitting because he’s an adult that still watches Pokemon.
Glenn is a bitch, he’s like a girl on her period without all the fun towel sex. It’s hard to hate Glenn with those dreamy blue eyes until you realize that he only uses them to look up at dudes as they cum on him. Some times 2 at once. Glenn always has a comment to make about the show or guest, but as soon as they fire back he runs away with his tail between his legs, because he doesn’t have a dick there. The only thing more infuriating than Glenn’s personality is his body. Kudos to him for losing all that weight since high school and still looking like a sack of cottage cheese that even Landin wouldn’t put in his mouth.
F*ck Glenn’s cat. I don’t like cats to begin with, much less one that willingly lets Glenn touch them. Cats have teeth and claws to fight back, so this animal has no excuse not to try and kill a human that licks its asshole. People say cats are smarter than dogs and this is proof that’s not true, a dog would have ran into the street and gotten hit by a car already.
The worst thing that’s ever happened to me is being called Glenn #2, its doesn’t make me angry because it’s the only time Glenn has been #1 at anything in his life. He’s going to fire back at this article and we’re all going to laugh at how not funny it is. Besides, you can’t write a good article when you’re too busy rubbing your mother’s feet and trying to have sex with Landin’s twitter scraps.